I know there are things I should learn, and then there are all the Belsnickel Impish or admirable ugly Christmas shirt, sweater and by the same token and things I want to learn. One of those lists is getting shorter, and one is getting longer. The whole concept of education focussing on the process, rather than the outcome, is a major paradigm shift for most people. The education structures we have in place are just not built for this, all our measurements are based on outcomes. I believe this results in children learning, parrot fashion, how to plug in the right answers, rather than actually understanding concepts. This is a really tough question for most people, and I noticed that the majority of answers are from women. I am going to answer this question based upon a decision I made 48 years ago. I am today 58 so I made this decision when I was ten. Family life was a wreck, I was an unwanted and unloved child growing up. I cannot tell you the number of times my mother told me she wished I was dead. The abuse in all respects was beyond torturous and it did not get better as time went on. There is so much more that was going on in my life that it would take me too long to write it all, but at ten years old I made my first attempt to end my life. Obviously failed. It was in that season that I made a decision I would never have children. At the age of 18 I visit a dr and told him what I wanted and with much arguing he finally consented because of my argument for the procedure. Here it is. My brothers and sisters have all been married multiple times. The brothers would go out like dogs in heat and act as if the female species were there to breed multiple children and then abandon them like trash. My sisters had several children and struggled all there life to rais them and they did very poorly. I think that God gave me the wisdom at that time to look down the road through the life of my family and realize I may not turn out much different than them. I also knew that no living human being deserved to go through what I was experiencing and I will eventually be like the rest of the family including the man who impregnated the womb I came out of. I would not allow that. I knew we become like those around us if if I was going to be like them then my family lineage needed to end. I could only do my part.
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